A Good Friend
Aristotle courtesy of Wikipedia
Friends. Everyone needs them. Some more than others. Being social animals, we as humans have friends and establish relationships with people for a variety of reasons. Regardless of the reasons for choosing to become friends with someone, for the most part, you can tell when there is a good friendship.
So what exactly makes a good friend. Well, according to Aristotle, a good friendship is one that is "based on a mutual appreciation of the virtues the other person holds dear.... [and] the people themselves and the qualities they represent provide the incentive of the two parties to be in each other's lives". Aristotle argues this is the best kind of relationship while also noting there is one of utility and one of pleasure, of which he deems to be "accidental friendships". The friendship of utility is one common in business, in which the relationship is established through a mutual agreement of using the other person's abilities. The friendship of pleasure is just that, a friendship in which there is a pleasure of the others company during a set of circumstances. And while I personally agree with Aristotle's idea of the best kind of friendship, I think there is more to add to it.
To most, it appears that a friend is one that stays with you when times are hard, loyal, and honest. And while these are great qualities, I feel like it is very superficial. Obviously you would want someone who stays with you when times are rough and is not afraid to let you know when you have done wrong. But what should be more important is the company they provide. No one ever wants to be with someone that brings constant negativity and makes nothing of themselves. There has to be a sort of mutual competition where both parties are constantly trying to improve the other instead of being an echo-chamber for each other. Psychology Today put it well when they say that a true friend is committed to your happiness (it should be assumed that it goes both ways) and does not pressure you to throw away your principles (a mutual appreciation of virtues as Aristotle says) and is a good influence.
Friends are an integral part of our development and for that reason, it is important that the friends we choose are not only good influence, but also good company. There should be no fear to bring up issues with the friend, and if there is issue, then that is a sign that they are not working to the mutual benefit of the friendship and are instead out for their own regard.
