What Love Entails

courtesy of Casey Chin

Love is an intense feeling of deep affection. At least in some definitions. In others, love is a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties. Whichever definition you choose to follow, it is a pretty difficult thing to define, and it is especially difficult to cope with. According to Psychology Today, love is a learned behavior, and it is developed from infancy, and from the interactions we garner with our caregivers dictates how we are to develop future relationships. However, current times, with the introduction of apps such as Tinder, and ease of long-distance communication, it is not too surprising to see the change in how love and relationships are made.

I am always conflicted with the idea of long-distance relationships, however, it seems as though it is now commonplace. The reason I have always had an issue with long-distance relationships almost always comes down to my fear of infidelity. Now, while this may be an irrational fear of mine, it still holds merit in regards to long-distance relationships. I am under the impression that a successful relationship requires strong communication, and while recent technologies has allowed for communication abroad to be easy, it should be noted that there lacks a physical presence. I am fully aware of technologies such as face-time among others, but it is not the same as physically being with another person. And with this, there lacks an intimate connection, and without a connection, there is more of a reason to go off and be with others who are actually present. While there are people who are less susceptible to such temptation, it feels as though it is really only a matter of time. The longer stretch of time there is between physical presence, the more the inclination to be with someone who will actually be present.

Moving onto dating apps, such as Tinder, it is also unsurprising to see yet another change in how relationships are changed. For starters, there is less of an actual connection with the person on the other end. What is meant by this is that the environment surrounding such dating apps has gone from looking for a real connection, to merely looking for a quick fling. And, because there is no real fear of rejection associated with this form of "dating" due to the game-like aspect of it, there is no real "quest" that goes along with looking for a partner. While this may seem to be following an archaic form of partner-seeking, it has been quite fundamental to the development of human-kind. That is not to say that apps such as Tinder are bad, it is merely that they are altering how we as a species go about looking for partners, and whether it is for the better or worse is yet to be determined as it is still quite novel.

So, while love is still very much an aspect of human development, there is no doubt that it is changing with current technologies. With long-distance relationships now being feasible and somewhat more common, I still caution those who are in long-distance relationships and advise them to ensure there is sufficient communication and physical presence. And for those on Tinder, try to go out with someone you have met in person, and make solid partners with those around you and stray away from the easy gratification of a quick fling.